The One That Got Away

The ONE THAT GOT AWAY…aaah, yes. Everyone has that person in the past who got away. That person whom we thought back then we would grow old with. As Kris Aquino’s character in the movie “Happy Together” said: BAKLA, THIS IS IT!!!

I decided to whip up this post because I was inspired by two blog friends: Owen of Simple Thoughts and his entry about the hardships of moving on, and Toni of Wifely Steps and her entry on teenage crushes. I hope after this, please share your story about “the one who got away.”

Mustering all of my strength, I went and re-visited my memory box for pictures. So, here it goes. The “one who got away from me” is…

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That’s not her!!! Although, look at the hair and the thinness! (Asks myself: WAS I DRUGS BACK THEN? LOL!)

 

 

 

 

 

 

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This is her, my college sweetheart, MARISSA S. PAREDES. The one that got away from me. We were together for 1 and a half years. She’s actually the exact opposite of my version of an “ideal girlfriend” back then. But during that time, I felt happy with her coz…well, she completed me. I loved how we make each other laugh. I can still remember her laugh…which could give Elvira Manahan a run for her money (josme ang mga age group lang ang makaka-relate nito at tatawa)

 

If there’s one thing that really bothered me was that she was not expressive and affectionate as opposed to moi who loves to hug and snuggle and kiss. Had to air my frustration to her during numerous serious and light talks. (Hey snglguy! See? Not only men have this flaw.)

 

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Exhibit A: group picture of our batch on our way home from our retreat in Franciscan Missionary of Mary on Tagaytay City. Me and Isay, far left. See the hug. Parang python.

 

 

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Exhibit B: Pic taken in Picnic Grove. We decided to take a romantic detour. See the arm around her? It’s a guy thing that tells everyone, especially to other guys, “akin lang to.” Hehehehe.

 

 

 

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So, how did she get away from me? Well, let’s just say she’s now married to her childhood friend, the guy which led to a bad break up after one and a half years of relationship that included wedding plans, discussion as to how many kids we want to have, where to live, etc. Looking at our graduation picture, I should have sensed that something was wrong.

 

 

But don’t you dare think ill of her (I’ll hunt you down). After almost a year of anger and believe it or not, a realization that I still loved her, I decided to talk to her on February 20 of 1996…her birthday. We talked a lot and asked how she’s doing. She said she’s getting married…to her childhood friend. I told her jokingly and sincerely: “Langya ka. Deny-deny ka pa nun.” We just laughed and I told her that one reason that I decided to talk to her is that I wanted to get back together. But since she’s getting married, I just said, “at least we’ll end without grudges and at least you know that I will always love you.” She now has two kids and is happily living in her husband’s ancestral home in Cavite.

After Isay, I really didn’t know if I could still find someone like her. But as I went through my life, there would never be anything like The One Who Got Away. I realized that The One could be anyone. As I said to Owen via his entry, “I felt your pain, man. You know, experience really becomes your best teacher. I have learned throughout the years of the joys and pains of loving and losing. I’ve also thought of the many times to “move on”. But in truth, what I learned is that you never move on. You just “move forward”…carrying on with your life, your past experiences never forgotten but will not bind you to pursue something better. The challenge now is not HOW to move forward, but WHEN. Only you can set that, my friend… In the meantime, as the song says: smile when your heart is aching”

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This is a favorite picture of me and Isay. I will always have my memories of her and our love…

 

 

 

 

This entry was bittersweet at first but funny in the end (and I was fearing for my life somewhere in the middle…mostly of Jher. Hahahaha!). I asked myself, HOW DID I GET FROM THIS…..

 

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…TO THIS? Hahahahaha!

 

Simple…I said WHEN

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27 Responses to The One That Got Away

  1. jher says:

    this is a very controversial post for me for obvious reasons. should i even react (violently or otherwise)? you be the judge! i’ll be waiting. hahahah😀

  2. snglguy says:

    I wish I could write something about the one that got away. How could I when I never had one, haha.😀

    Elvira Manahan? HAHAHAHAHA!!!! That throaty laugh is something that echoed in our television sets during the 70’s and 80’s in her show with Nestor Torre Jr.

  3. annabanana says:

    jerome,
    teary eyed ako after reading this post…just like you, i also have a “the one who got away”…i guess ill summon enough courage to blog about him…di na ako post dito, blog ko na lang ha my dear. jher darling, cool ka lang…you know bridget loves you!

  4. atticus says:

    wow! so this is part of the “beer talk” with snglguy.

    wala akong masabi.

    wow. ulit.

  5. Awww what a sweet post. It reminds me of my first bf but then again I never regretted that we broke up. I was just thankful that at least he became a part of my life before. Now I learned that he is moving to NY from New Zealand. We still chat a bit and also the funny thing now is that my present bf has similar qualities to my first bf.

  6. jane says:

    aww, you guys look good together, i mean jher and you of course he he
    hmmmm…let me see, i was the one who got away from (looks around baka hubby is peeping) ay, nevermind. har har!

  7. jher says:

    anna – ewan magsama kayo ni bridget. lol bat ako ang nag rereak dito?

  8. baktin says:

    ummmm… for a few seconds i was thinking…

    pare, i will also write about my one that got away. and i definitely agree with you that we do not actually move on. we simply have to move forward. sabi pa ng good friend ko: pain is inevitable. but grief is optional.

    oh well. (me singing “Jason Blunt’s You’re Beautiful: “and it’s time to face the truth. i could never be with you” )

    *brotherly hug*

  9. baktin says:

    ummmm… for a few seconds i was thinking…

    pare, i will also write about my one that got away. i agree with you that we do not actually move on. we simply have to move forward. sabi pa ng good friend ko: pain is inevitable. but grief is optional.

    oh well. (me singing “James Blunt’s You’re Beautiful: “and it’s time to face the truth. i could never be with you” )

    *brotherly hug*

  10. K says:

    Beautiful post, Jason. And I can’t be brave enough to share one like this.

    “I’ve also thought of the many times to “move on”. But in truth, what I learned is that you never move on. You just “move forward””

    So don’t look back and keep putting one foot
    in front of the other and take your life day by day. Perhaps you’ll go places you never expected and see things that you’ve never seen and wonderful spots in between – I think you have already found it.

    PS. Who is Elvira Manahan?:mrgreen:

  11. jher says:

    Who’s Jason? LOL.

    Well Bridge my love looks like marami kang kakampi. Good decision to have it posted.😛

  12. K says:

    Hahaha I’m sorry, Jerome rather. Thanks for the correction, Jher.

  13. owen says:

    hehehehe i’ve learned a lot from my experienced… yaw ko ng maulit muli..don’t wana get hurt, i do’nt wana cry… tama na..
    heheh naka move on na po ako kuya….

    tnx for appreciating my post….

  14. kalories says:

    aaawww…i wish i had enough courage to post my “the one that got away”…marami sila eh..nyahahaha. joke lang…feeling ko naman. ang bait mo. you still have wonderful things to say about her.🙂 i don’t know if i could be like that. sometimes, too much pain just makes me bitter. kasi naman…mga boys! hehe…ang gulo ng comment ko. hehe. basta, natuwa ako sa post mo!

  15. Dylan Gozum says:

    *grimaces, clutches chest and gasps for air*

  16. Lani says:

    Ano ba sistah, muntik na naman akong maiyak sa entry na ito. Talagang ikaw, madrama ang life. I’m really happy I met you online, alam ko good person ka dahil very loving at very honest.

    Thanks for sharing, Bridget. Ako nag-iisip pa kung ise-share ko kasi iyong first love ko e malamang puppy love ko lang talaga. At wala akong maisip na maganda kasi malayo kami sa isa’t isa.

  17. jher says:

    where’s the new post? i really wanna get over this one. lol.

  18. Jenn says:

    wow! that was a very nice, honest post. well i’m just like the rest, not yet sure they’re brave enough to write about the one that got away. maybe some day…

  19. curacha says:

    First serious love that was never meant to be… I experienced that too and ended up hating each other. Nice post!

  20. jcdaclison says:

    snglguy – ikaw talaga! ang age group napaghahalata! hahahaha! inuman na!

    anna – sige. pagchismisan na lang natin ang the one that got away mo pag umuwi ka. hahahaha!

    atticus – salamat sa wow, mare. para tuloy gusto kong kumanta ala regine: tara na byahe tayo! hahahaha!

    chas – well, maybe sometimes subconsciously we do look for qualities that are similar to the one that we lost. maybe to “replace” them? i dunno. what do you think?

    jane – sige, mare. (whispers) ibulong mo sa akin…hahahahaha!

    baktin – write all you can, pare koi. btw, i hope you dont mind if i use your friend’s quote one of these days. i like it! (gives you one big brotherly hug as well)

    k – i have found it (“it” talaga? parang non-living thing? hahahaha)

    owen – buti naman at naka-move on ka na, bunso…(kuya ka jan…) hahahaha!

    karol – gaaaaaang! na miss kita. you know, i have been getting that comment: that i’m BRAVE for posting this. (directs question to everyone) do you think this post is about COURAGE?

    dylan – (gives you CPR)

    lani – naku salamat naman at nagustuhan mo. tenk you din at mahal mo din ako. kaya mahal din kita eh. kasi alam kong busilak ang iyong kalooban, kapatid. mwah!

    Jenn – thanks, mare! hope to see you more often…

    curacha – thanks, mare! always visit ha? btw, loved the “ended up hating each other” revelation. sabi nga ng office mate ko: KAYA NGA SYA “EX” DI BA? KASI TARANTADO SYA KAYA WALA NA KAMI!” hahahahahaha!

    jher – babe, as i have said: you are my present…the NOW that matters to me most–The One that makes me frown and smile, cry and laugh, suffer and rejoice, …The One that is presently MY PRESENT and hopefully, with hard work, The One whom I will share my future with…

  21. toni says:

    Hi Bridget! That stolen shot looks so wonderful. Candid shots talaga are the best ways to capture the real story. And this was a beautifully-written entry.

    And on the last question, whether it’s a “how” or a “when”, what matters is that it’s happennig and you’re both happy with each other. Karez?!?🙂

  22. jcdaclison says:

    toni – i know. that’s why jher threw a fit! hahahaha! but he’s okay now. i agree that the now is important and that NOW…i’m happy…kaya karez ka jan!!!

  23. Looking back at what you and Isay were back then and what you and Jher are right now shows me that although she was THE ONE WHO GOT AWAY, you know who is THE ONE for you. I actually saw Jher’s post before this and I can relate to his pain — and in the same way I can relate to how you feel. It’s always tricky revisiting our past loves.. but it can be a form of closure as well. As always, very well written — touching, and a joy to read. Thank you for sharing this part of you with us, Jerome..MWAH!

  24. tom says:

    yep. i agree. what’s important is that you’re both happy. naks. hehe

  25. yuri says:

    jerome… my gosh, u always make me cry. what u just said is so true. i just hope and pray.. deep inside of him, im still his one true love… awww..

  26. Hayley Jane says:

    Hey – at least things worked out in the end🙂 The One That Got Away is a painful subject for everyone I find. And in my experience, this subject became incredibly less painful when I found a new and improved One! A shiny new model that wasn’t a bastard🙂

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